If this week had a theme, it would be “business as usual”. I am now simply a “mom-of-two”; no longer a new or “postpartum mom”. Life is hectic, but I’m used to it. It’s actually difficult to imagine my family any other way. There are very few changes from day to day now, which is why I am reducing my postpartum updates to every second week.
Despite success adapting to my new life, I occasionally catch myself in a foul mood with a wicked internal dialogue that goes something like this:
- “Why is it so @$%^ing difficult to get out of the house?
- Why must my children conspire to prevent me from (exercising/running errands/getting ready/surfing the web)? I need MEEEE time!?!
- Why is (my husband/mother/stranger at the store counter) taking so damn long to get on with it? Are they trying to $%^& things up so that both my children are screaming bloody murder before I have the chance to do what needs to get done?
Wickedness, I know. Please don’t hate me.
Even as I have these thoughts, I feel tremendously guilty about them. Here I have two beautiful healthy girls; how dare I get irate over silly plans falling to pieces? In my blessed world, no one is going to starve if I don’t make it to the grocery store, so what’s the big deal?
These are the times I remember that I’m still a new mom, adapting to a much more demanding new reality, and try to forgive myself these minor funks. While this new life feels natural 90% of the time, some growing pains are to be expected. I still have a lot to learn!
Vital Stats
Sleep: I would estimate that I have about 51% odds of getting a good sleep on any given night. Save a few quick feeds, my eight week old now sleeps through the night slightly more than half the time. The other 49% of the time, she’s wide awake in need of being entertained for two hours in the early morning. Given that my firstborn was a severely colicky baby with months of day/night confusion, I am well aware how blessed I am to be getting decent shut eye!
Breastfeeding: Tandem feeding is woking out well for my family. There’s no set nursing routine for my two-year-old (she might only nurse once in a day, and at no specific time), but she is so joyful to have that one-on-one time with me that I can’t fathom cutting her off just to appease societal norms.
Body: I’m very curvy with boobs D+ cup boobs. Sometimes I dig the voluptuousness, other times not so much.
Fitness: Now that I’m fully capable of jogging again, I’ve stopped the baby-and-me classes in favor of regular runs. What’s changed is that my uterus is now another muscle I must listen to while working out. It used to be that sore legs or breathlessness brought a run to its end; now I must consider tenderness around my scar and be careful not to cause injury.
C-Section Scar: The area above the scar is no longer prone to increased swelling. There remains a very slight puffiness above the scar that is visible in tight clothing.
Scheduling: I almost forgot I was doing this! Our routine is starting to feel like second nature, rather than an agenda. Even my two-year-old is largely on board, although “nap time” is often reduced to “playing in bed time”.
Emotional Well-Being: Great (notwithstanding moments of overwhelming frustration).
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